The Life and Lies of...

I’m trying to decide if I want to live at the beach again this summer or if I just want to stay here and work at Harris Teeter. I know to most people that sounds like an obvious choice, beach of course. But last summer was a weird time for me. I loved living at the beach but I also hated it. I lived with my grandparents and their smoking caused me to smoke my first cigarette and look where that got me, it sucks. My grandma is also really awful to me because she’s convinced I’m an evil Liberal. If it hadn’t been for my grandpa, I’d have been in really bad shape last summer. Plus I had two jobs; a full time and a part time. I was working around 75 hours a week. It was my lost summer. I didn’t talk to people much other than the people I worked with, I got on tumblr maybe once a week, and I was just in my own little world.

If I did move there for the summer, I’d definitely only have one job, the tshirt shop. They pay either $9.50 or $10 and hour and it’s the easiest job ever. I sat around and read books all summer at work. The two jobs was just a lot to handle for me.

Then there’s the whole Anthony thing. No, not my ex Anthony, I don’t give a shit about him (not in a mean way, just in a we aren’t even on each other’s radars anymore way) I mean the guy I had a thing with this summer. I haven’t really told anyone about it. It was…intense. I’ve never felt that way about someone before. It’s probably the closest I’ve ever gotten to love, but it ended badly and now we don’t talk. It’s my fault though. I just don’t want to have to deal with seeing him all the time and I definitely would. It’s a small town.

But I think if I went back this summer, I’d do it right. I’d live at the beach the right way and have a lot of fun with it. And I wouldn’t be stoned for most of the summer either, that’s like all I did with my free time.

So yeah this is just me getting out all my thoughts about what I should do. I just don’t know. I hated it when I was there but now that I’m back here, I miss it.